You're in a Relationship With Money

Ready to talk about that?

Oct 05, 2021

Welcome to The First Years of Marriage Newsletter! We talk about the conversations, challenges, and changes that begin once the honeymoon ends. Advice from experts, mistakes from me (Jen Glantz), and things you’re going to want to know as you continue to ask yourself this question - “I’m married, so now what?”

One more thing for you:

I am creating a FIRST YEARS OF MARRIAGE card game. It’s a fun way to chat about the conversations, challenges, and next steps in your life with the person you said I DO to! Some of the cards in the game were even submitted by readers of this darling newsletter. Check it out and support the Kickstarter, if you can, for really fun bonus gifts!

Money is a Part of Your Marriage

One of the most common convos that happen throughout the life of a relationship is the convo around money.

Talking about finances can be super awkward, frustrating, strange, and filled with emotions.

We always talk about the relationships we have with people, but did you know this:

You also have a relationship with money.

Yes, you do.

It’s how you spend it, save it, view it, use it, care about it, think about it….

Your relationship with money might be very different than your partners, which is where a lot of drama can pop-up in a marriage.

I love talking about love and I love talking about money.

When Adam and I started getting “serious” in the first year of dating, I brought up finances and suggested we show each other our money habits.

Very quickly, we were both able to see the ways we value money the same and the blaring differences too.

A couple doesn’t have to be entirely on the same page with their money habits, but they should be open to talking about their own relationship with cash and the ways they want to build a joint goals when it comes to money, money, money.

I recently did a video on this topic for TLC/TLCME that you can eyeball here.

It featured Adam Kol, The Couple’s Financial Coach who shared five tips on the kinds of convos newly married couples (or those engaged or even dating) should have about finances.

Read on to find out what Adam said.

1. Money & Relationships Story:

What experiences have you had around money, both in relationships and in general? Share your financial perspectives, and explore how your identity affects your money mindset.

2. Current Situation:

What are your current income, expenses, assets, and debts?

3. Financial Priorities:

What are your most important short and medium-term goals? Which of your monthly expenses are most worth it, and which could be expendable?

4. Account Structures:

Do we want all Joint Accounts, all Separate Accounts, or a mix? How will we track and manage any joint expenses?

5. Creating & Protecting Your Future:

Kids: How many, and when? What do you want to provide for them,
i.e. extracurriculars, money for college, etc.?

Retirement + Estate Planning: When do you want to retire, where
do you want to live, and with what standard of living? Do you have a will
and/or trust? If you were unable to make decisions for yourself,
what would you want to have happen?*

Insurance: What risks do you want to insure against, i.e.
premature death, inability to work, etc.?

Marital Agreements: What assurances would put your mind at ease
and allow you to invest 100% in the success of this marriage?

Want more tips? Watch it here.

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Love you (for as long as we both shall live),

Jen Glantz